The home of this list of tips can be found at the end of an article at the TimesOnline that wonders if we are about to enter an era where chefs don't scream and throw stuff at their employees. The author wonders if the recent appearance of female chefs in a profession that was (and still is) dominated by males might alter the dynamic of the realtionship between the chef and the brigade de cuisine and lead to a kinder, gentler, more democratic style of management.
I say yes, because as everyone knows, women never scream or throw things. They are incapable of being dictatorial and intolerant and always value communication over bullying and intimidation. Sorry, I couldn't resist.
Things you should never do in a restaurant
•Trust the hollandaise sauce. Bacteria love it, and it’s never made to order.
•Even think about ordering anything if the bathrooms are filthy. Imagine what the kitchen must be like.
•Order your steak well done. You’re likely to end up with meat that the chef was unhappy to send out to anyone else.
•Go on a Monday. A lot of wine will be sold at the weekend, so the bottle you fancy could be out of stock.
•On Mondays, the ‘fresh fish’ could be less than fresh: boats don’t go out on a Sunday. And it’s a quieter day, so the chef is likely to not be there.
•Order the special. It could be that the chef legitimately wants to try out something new. But it might just as likely be designed to push older inventory.
• Get seduced by something with a sauce or gravy — they cover up mistakes.
•Order a medium steak and send it back as it’s pink in the middle. That’s what it’s meant to look like. Send it back when it’s not the kitchen’s fault and you open yourself up to a world of pain.
•Order oysters. Ever. I have a gastroenterologist friend, and the one thing he’ll never eat is oysters — they can contain the dangerous vibrio bacteria.
•Order off-menu. You’re just showing off. Unless you’re on a special diet. A chef does a menu to the best of his ability, and if you turn your nose up at it, you’re unlikely to get the best out of him. [Source]